Tag: overpopulation

Tired Trends of 2011 and the Coming Pig-Apocalypse

(Witness the inevitable truck-wreck of human existance)

The Trends to Retire Before 2012:

The Great Bacon Love-In –

The bacon-craze continues as strongly as ever.  There was a time when people actually cared that it is not good for you in great quantity.  For at least two years now this trend has unleashed the devil across the country, encouraging people to declare their bacon devotion against all health warnings in great defiance with only slight frightened glances at the doctor examining blood panels.  It has reached such a pitch that it has become a little revolting.  Every article about bacon and every bacon recipe is now given as a bold invitation to a group masturbation session.  Yes, you love the mighty cured pig flesh.  Yay you.  Oh you sexy things – nothing more sexy than your greasy esophagus – please tell me what else you will slather in bacon while I wallow in this forbidden pleasure (obviously while naked) that health gurus are trying to destroy!

I’ve got news for you: no one gives a shit if you want to slather yourself in bacon and wash your hair in rendered bacon fat.  In fact, no one cares if you render your own fat while you do it.  Get a room and get it over with.

Meat Obsession –

There is a great general meat obsession going on that I believe is a backlash to all the reports that meat isn’t all that healthy in great quantities.  This is an extension of the bacon trend but less masturbatory in expression.  Americans love their meat.  Tell them they shouldn’t have too much meat and they freak out because that’s the only real food group many Americans recognize outside of McDonald’s (as a whole food group).  If some meat is good, more meat is better.  In fact, meat stuffed with meat and then wrapped in meat is a gluttonous trend I’m seeing everywhere.  It’s only a matter of time before we’ve gone beyond bacon doughnuts and start doing pork filled doughnuts made with rendered veal fat and slathered in a steak-butter-sugar glaze.  Give it a rest.  Give your body a damn rest.  No wonder so many Americans’ skin looks as shiny and as textured as fat-slicked-burgers.

On the other hand, continuing on this meat craze may result in self-selecting yourselves out of the gene pool leaving room for a civilization more secure in itself and a lot healthier.  Carry on!

Nostalgia –

I realize this is an age-old trend but I think I’m feeling more bombarded by it these days as my peers and I have reached middle age.  That seems to be a typical time to start feeling nostalgia for pretty much everything in the past.  My sister was explaining some of the main concepts that she studies in the Shambala center she meditates at and does retreats with.  The main one is being completely in the present.  This struck me as something I need to practice more.  I DON’T feel any nostalgia.  Ever.  I never look back on my past with bittersweet longing.  Or any longing.  However, I have my own issues and I freely admit that I’ve indulged in bitterness over the last few years at what I perceive to be the hardest years I’ve had since my suicidal teen years.  I am not living fully in the present when I indulge in such feelings of bitterness.  You who are indulging in nostalgia of any stamp are also not living in the present, not only that, nostalgia is really irritating to those not experiencing it.  It gets tiring to hear it in your lilting voice full of that indefinable space between pleasant memory and sorrow that it is in the past.  How about this: you and me practice being in the present more this year?  Let’s do that together.

Large Families –

This is a trend that has been on the upswing since after the plague hit Europe.  No famine, no disease, and no natural disasters have had significant impact on the overall population expansion of the world.  We can’t keep growing like this.  Don’t throw me statistics and numbers to show that it isn’t YOUR fault or OUR fault and that it has nothing to do with YOU or ME and that it’s all THEM and THEIR fault.

Look, I had a kid.  I contributed.  I don’t regret having my child and I don’t expect anyone else to feel even a shred of guilt for the children they’ve already had either, no matter how many.  They’re here already and deserve all the love and happiness you feel to have had them.

But there is every opportunity to apply family planning to your own life and to promote it as an important concept world-wide.  Over population is EVERYONE’S concern because every single child born on this planet requires resources.  Why should anyone care how many kids you have?  Why is it their business?  The bald fact is that every child you have takes resources away from other children.  The more children you have, the more resources you are claiming for you and your family that will not be available to others.  Even if you are being very conscious about your use of resources, every person born needs a certain amount of food and water to survive.  There is no statistic that is going to change that fact.

As of this year there are 7 BILLION people on this planet.  People gotta die or not be born in the first place to make room for those of us already here.  There is a finite number of resources on this planet.  I want everyone who wants to have a family to be able to have a family.*  For that to be possible – people need to choose to have smaller families.  I’ve said it, you can hate me all you want, the facts remain the same.

War is a Bloody Exhausted Trend-

This trend is sick and wrong and our own country has been fighting for ten years and what we’ve won is nothing much.  What we’ve lost is a lot of money and a few soldiers.  What we’ve destroyed is a lot more than what we’ve personally lost.  We’ve killed over 1oo,000 Iraqi civilians.  We’ve lost almost none of our own civilians.  Supposedly our soldiers are all headed home from Iraq this month.  Forgive me if I’m cynical and think that we’re still holding a few back to “control” or “help” the situation.  Obviously I’ll be thrilled if it really turns out to be true and we are completely out of Iraq this month.  We still have Afghanistan to pull out of.  Time to wrap up all war-mongering and stop being the enormous ass-hole country we’ve been for the last decade.  Time to work on our own problems at home and lord do we have some HUGE problems here.

Pulling money from Public Schools –

Public schools worked a lot better, had much better results, and churned out a better quality education when it actually had funding.  People complain about it, we take more money away from them, people complain more, we take more funds away from them – it’s insane.  Any respectable educational institution in the world requires good funding to pay teachers and to buy good supplies.  Without it – they will fail.  They are failing because we are forcing them to fail.  While a few people may be giving good educations to their children through homeschooling or by sending their kids to private ($$$) schools, this is not an option for most Americans who do not have a parent at home to home-school or the funds to send them to private schools.

Even if most households had a parent at home able to educate their children, a frightening number of people in this country are too ignorant themselves to give their kids an education at home.  Generally they are too ignorant because they did not get a good education due to lack of funding to the public schools they attended.  See the connection?  The ignorance level in this country is alarming and the only way to fix it is to build up and make our public schools better.

The Consumer trend –

Every 0ne of us is a consumer.  We all need things we can’t produce ourselves.  Consumerism is a fact of life and not something to be ashamed of.  However, in this country we have become great purveyors of crap.  Those who can afford it buy more expensive crap.  Our lives use up a lot of energy and half the things in our homes were made by the worst paid people on the planet many of whom are children.  Fuck that shit.  Buy things only when you need them.

Have occasional splurges for joy – but do it thoughtfully and get the most enjoyment you can out of each splurge.  Fix more of the things you already have when they break.  It often doesn’t seem worth it – but choosing to fix things keeps more toxic crap out of the landfill and that is worth a lot of money.  I broke our little television recently and fixing it cost almost 75% of the original price of the thing (it was a cheap small one I use for my craft room) and I could have gotten something more up to date and flashy but until I broke it this tv was quite good.  We got it fixed.  One less tv in the landfill for at least a few more years.  Try it.  At least give that option a thought every single time something in your house breaks.

Buy less, buy things that are made better and will last longer whenever you can swing it.  This is not a smug asshole way to live – it’s a shift everyone needs to make.  Most people I know are already making it in one way or another.  It can take time.  If you haven’t started making the shift – start this year.  A hunger for things, shopping to make you feel better when you’re blue, and always having to get the next upgrade is stupid – knock that fucking shit off.

(I’m writing this from a used IBM laptop with no frills, a small screen, and a utilitarian cover.  It is sturdy, a fraction of the cost of new, and does everything I need it to.  Consider that: I make my living online.  I write.  I blog.  I process photographs.  I use this thing constantly and it does EVERYTHING I need it to.  I’m just telling you because I know for a fact you don’t all need the newest laptops.  You really truly don’t, no matter what excuses you have all handy.) 

Fur in Fashion –

For god’s sake – stop paying to skin minks for your vanity.  I’m guessing women feel rich and powerful in fur because they’re wearing another animal’s skin over their own in possessive manner – like great big important chiefs with lion skin capes proving their dominion over all other animals on earth. NEWSFLASH: I know you didn’t hunt down that animal yourself and skin it and tan it with your own piss so wearing it is not an indication of prowess, it proves only your desire to show people you can afford to dress in fur.  (Even if you did hunt it yourself – you didn’t use a spear or your own bare hands, you used a fucking gun.  Big deal.  Animals have no defense against a gun.  If you live in either of the poles I 100% agree that fur may be the only real way to keep warm.  Awesome.  While it may get cold in Manhattan, it is by no means necessary to wear mink.)

Actually, I know the real reason women like to wear it is because it represents wealth and exclusivity.  It’s not every ho who can afford a pair of mink earrings to go with their mink coats.

In conclusion I will predict that none of these trends are going to stop this year or any year soon.  The alternative is to prepare for the great animal uprising and the inevitable Pig-apocalypse where all women are used by pigs to suckle their young while they feed on our own babies and enslave the menfolk to sit in confinement their entire lives only to see the light for periodic conjugal-cage visits to ensure a steady supply of suckling human babies for the pig trough.  I will, therefore, prepare an outfit for the coming animal uprising and pray that my lifelong vegetarianism goes some way to preserving me from their wrath.  Onward, then, towards the dire future!

*I have two friends who are pregnant right now and if they don’t know how happy I am that they’re going to get to be parents, then they don’t know me at all.

Many Kinds of Thorns in My Skin

I’ve been noticing a lot of bloggers making comments about how their “real” lives are not perfect and they proceed to assure you that behind the gorgeous bucolic scenes on their blogs there is mad chaos and dirty dishes.  They offer this up like a gift – so that readers will not be annoyed by all the pretty they came to see in the first place.  I just have to laugh at myself.  I seem to have made a practice of constantly showing everyone the seamy side of my life, the dirty laundry.  I showed you a fucking mushroom I had growing in one of my bathrooms for God’s sake!

So I was thinking that sometime soon, (not now), I should try going for pretty and tranquil and gentle for a change.  It might not be easy to find a corner of pretty and tranquil in this house.  Most of it is liberally covered in pet fur which is only pretty when still on the pets.

I hate the expression “on the cheap”.  I can’t even say why.  There’s nothing intrinsically bad about it.

Lots and lots of nightmares lately.  Saw a head get blown off, had some usual classroom related anxiety dreams, almost becoming adulterous (these are as stressful as smoking dreams except that whereas I used to smoke, I have never been adulterous), dystopian landscapes in which people are trying to maintain some sense of culture.

I’ve only been up for an hour and a half and so far I’ve had to mop up: cat pee, coffee spills, and ice water.  Can I go back to bed now?  I can’t imagine anything good will come of the next sixteen hours.

I should mention that I have some barely hidden wishes for the human race to be obliterated completely.  These feelings rarely go completely away but are made more acute when something triggers them into renewed fury.  Such as the Penn State scandal.  I had to fight my blackberry bushes for two hours to tame my hatred for human beings.  We have done nothing worthy while living on this earth.  I am trying harder than you can imagine not to go off about this whole thing.  If it makes anyone feel better, my blackberry bushes fought back just as hard and my skin is full of tiny thorns my tweezers can’t remove.

Many animal species, when resources are scarce, stop breeding.  What do we do?  We just have more and more babies.  We hit 7 Billion people on earth last week.  That’s a fuck load of vermin.  I myself contributed one to this number so I don’t hold myself apart from anyone else.  I don’t even try because I’ve known my whole life I’m not better than other people.  I guess I can say that maybe I’ve contributed less to overpopulation than the Duggars who really, desperately, need to stop having children just because they can.  It is appalling and very much like gluttony which is a sin in their religion.  Gluttony is not just about food or drink.  Gluttony can be applied to anything you have a greed for.  Some people make a stupid amount of cakes but the Duggars make a stupid amount of people.

I wish I could see a clear way to changing things in this world.

In case not enough people realize this: it’s time to stuff your meat with more meat and whenever possible-wrap it all in bacon.  The backlash against the unpopular concept that a lot of meat isn’t healthy has reached ridiculous proportions.  I get the feeling that many meat lovers love meat so much they’d roll in it so they could smell it all day if it wouldn’t attract unwanted attention from other hungry carnivores.  I don’t mind people eating meat, but Jesus! people, take it easy.

I tried watching that show “The New Girl” and it was so bad there’s no amount of desperation that could make me watch it again.  I’d rather read a Barbara Cartland romance.  It’s supposedly a “hit” show, how is that possible with such bad acting and such a stupid plot and all that precious “cuteness” that Zooey attempts to convince us is unselfconscious?  In my experience, the girls who act like that in real life do not also look sleekly adorable in that semi-ironic ultra fashionable school-marm chic.

On the plus side of things I went on a great field trip on Saturday with my friend Nicole (which I will write more about on Stitch and Boots) to a “Fill Your Pantry” event in Shedd, Oregon.  This is the second year this event has been held.  A bunch of local grain and legume producers (with a few produce growers as well) get together and offer up locally grown and milled grains.  Best buy: I got a bag of organic locally grown hard red wheat flour – 20 lbs for $15!  As a bonus it came in an actual flour sack.  When you can get locally grown hard wheat at that price – there’s no excuse to use conventionally grown hard wheat from out of state.  There is nothing more fun than hanging out for hours with a friend who gets just as excited as I do about pantry stocking, local food, food, eating, preserving, gardening, and food.  Just thinking about it is making me less grumpy.

I should preserve this feeling by going to fetch another cup of coffee and looking at the small handsome bag of rye flour I bought as a treat.  Cheers to a cat-pee-free morning for all of you!

Figments of the Liberals’ Imagination (and their agenda to control you with evil)

I have recently had to read more mommy and Christian mommy blogs than I can choke down without a corresponding scream mushrooming up through my esophagus.  I don’t do this to myself for recreation, I promise you.

The declaration that overpopulation doesn’t exist and is a figment of liberal fantasy to try to control people is unbelievable.  A real case of reading data very selectively.  Someone asserted that there is a “birth dearth” and the numbers support this.  Looking at numbers in a vacuum, like most people do, is dangerous and leads to a lot of misinformation.

You have to consider that while world birth rates might be down this year from last (Oh God!  HAVE MORE BABIES NOW SO HUMANS DON’T GO EXTINCT!) the population of humans on this earth works in exponential numbers (do you remember those from math class?) and you have to compare the number of people on earth right now (over 6 billion)   to how many people were living on this earth fifty years ago, a hundred years ago, a thousand years ago.

There used to be room on this planet for humans AND Mastodons.  Hell, there used to be room for humans AND elephants.

Overpopulation isn’t about whether or not we’ve sustained a population number from one year to the next.  This planet has been over populated for a long time.  It was overpopulated last year.  And the year before.  And a decade before that too.  So when you pull out the yearly birth numbers you should put it in a context that actually tells you something.

When the world population is down by fifty percent there will still be so many people on this planet God really need not fear we die out, relieving all of you of the necessity to go forth and produce multitudes of babies.

I think that how I look at over population and how other people look at over population are very different.  Some people apparently don’t think it’s possible to overpopulate the earth.  Some people think as long as they and their family still have water and food then the earth can handle more people.

I ask this: how well is the human population on earth doing?  How many resources can we possibly use up, how many more millions of people on this planet need to live in poverty and die of hunger before we consider that maybe humans have already collectively bred too fiercely for the earth’s resources to support them?  Hunger and starvation don’t happen because people are too stupid to grow things for themselves or to find clean water.  There isn’t enough room for us all to grow enough food and sometimes when we have the room we don’t have the water or the money to keep it going.  And sometimes there’s the room but it’s all owned by government and other corporations who don’t give a shit about you and your subsistence living family.

Whether or not you care about over-population (and your part in it) is up for discussion between you and your conscience.

Whether or not it exists is a matter of mathematical fact arrived at by the measurable finite resources on the planet (food, water, land, breathable air), the amount of those resources needed by each human, the number of humans needing those resources, and how fast humans multiply.

You also have to decide whether you’re doing the equation with the minimum needs of people or what they’d need to consider themselves leading a healthy and abundant life, which is really what everyone hopes for, right?

I don’t personally need to write out that complex math problem because I already see the evidence of the answer all around me.

I don’t care about anyone but me:

Having to read this choice piece of idiocy “I don’t care where my meat comes from or how it’s raised.  I buy  meat based on two factors: taste and price.” made me tired and sad.   The same person goes on to claim that all this crap about ethical and environmentally responsible methods of raising meat is just hyperbole spread by people with the specific agenda to boost sales in niche markets.

I’ve never heard a more calloused dismissal of the treatment of livestock by human beings or of the quality of food you put in your body and the bodies of the people you love.

Taste and price.

Taste and price.

I wonder what my life would be like if I based all my decisions based on taste and price?

I’m not a natural woman:

I’m not a normal woman.  I get fresh evidence of this every single day.  The more exposure I get to people the more uncomfortable I feel.  Either I’m uncomfortable with them and their beliefs and their values and their choices or they make me feel uncomfortable about mine.  I know and love so many incredible women and yet I find myself outside their feelings about so many things.

I often feel more like a man than a woman.

I don’t want to BE a man.  I don’t feel like a man in a woman’s body.  Yet I sometimes feel that my general lack of sentimentality is a seriously unfeminine quality.  I put my writing ambitions ahead of my husband and child the way a man is expected to do, to be ambitious enough to demand the time and space to achieve what he’s supposed to achieve out in the world.  I did stay home with my kid and I’m deeply thankful I was able to do it but never has having a child been the fulfillment for me that it seems to be for most other women.

I see children as people.  I don’t have a soft fuzzy lens through which to appreciate them.  They are simply underdeveloped human beings who have a lot of needs.  I really like kids when they aren’t in bunches.  I don’t get them from a maternal viewpoint, though.  I evaluate them as developing people.  I see them as humans who are one day going to piss me off.

I read blogs where women are gushing about their kids and I feel like what I really need to do is go find a quiet corner in a men’s club and light up a cigar and read the paper.  There are a few parenting blogs where the mother in question is a keen observer and an excellent writer who can make me really care about her children and her experiences parenting but so many posts women write about their kids gush shit like “I’ve learned SO MUCH since I had you, my little fluffball-poopy-pants!” but they never actually say what the hell they learned.  Mostly what they seem to learn is that parenting is hard or that they are so very blessed in their lives.

Which is nice.  I’m happy for them.

But what about all the ethical questions being a parent forces you to grapple with?  What about the lessons about death, dying, and how some kids want to kill themselves and aren’t feeling all that blessed.  What about that?

If I was a regular woman I’d say things like “My uterus aches every time I see a baby.” and “Now that my kid is ten years old I feel devastated that he’s not my little baby anymore!” and “I will put off writing my novel until my kid no longer needs me, when I die.”  and “I just MELT every time Max farts!” and “I completely submit to my hubby because God made him the leader of my goddamn pack of feral dogs-

Oh wait- I got a little carried away there.  That was obnoxious of me.

I feel feral most of the time.

When sex is a four letter word:

That brings up this other trend I’m noticing amongst the conservative Christian crowd: the great return of the subservient woman.

I hear women say they are submissive to their husbands even when they know their husbands are making poor decisions for their family well-being because God expects the men to be the head of the family and it’s the duty of a woman to support him even if she can steer the family’s well-being better.  I guess some women think they’re sacks of potatoes.

It makes me angry.

There are conversations out there where women are suggesting that wives should have sex with their husbands even when they don’t want to, because it’s their job.

The other word for making a woman feel obligated to have sex with you when she doesn’t want to is: RAPE.

What kind of asshole bastard man wants his woman to submit to having sex with him when she doesn’t want to?

Any woman can tell you that if you have sex with a man because you feel you have to but you don’t really want to:

a) it hurts physically

b) it feels like a violation

c) it’s demoralizing

d) it’s bad shit and should never NEVER happen

Is this just another way I’m unfeminine?

I’ve been married for almost eighteen years and one of the reasons for it is that I’m not married to an asshole power-tripping megalomaniac.

Rise, Martyrs, for you have suffered for the sake of suffering and now must be rewarded with NOTHING:

Suffering for the glory of suffering for your faith because it’s an honor to suffer for your man/family/children/god… I’m not the martyr type.  Suffering happens spontaneously enough in life that no one should have to orchestrate their own special hell so they can feel good that they are surviving it.

The other day the image of Christ leading people over the edge of a cliff to their doom like lemmings popped into my head.  I didn’t think it on purpose.  I didn’t think it to offend my Christian friends.  I just thought about the concept of complete faith that Jesus is good, that he will only lead people to good things, that no part of his plan is to make you suffer…

and the image just popped into my head because no one can be sure that Jesus doesn’t plan to walk everyone off the cliffs of Dover.

Ted Bundy was charismatic too.